Fraught day, today. I called Amy [last name removed– my mother’s doctor] to ask her to reach out to da. The initial goa, which I passed by Eric, was to get him both talking, which he hadn’t been, and talking to other people. There was a point where she asked me whether or not I should let her mention that this was coming from a place of concern, from Eric & I.
Initially, I passed. Then I said yes.
My hope was that it would foment a stronger conversation between the three of us.
His response was immediate and angry:
“Did you sic her on me?! WTF?”
Eric & I both want badly to help him, but find ourselves basically powerless. He resists at every step.
No idea what to do here, moms.
Becky & I spoke about this for the longest time. I could never have anticipated the lavel of anger in his reply. I know (only now) you had a pretty shit time with the shrink that grandma sent you to as a “willful child.” I assume that was traumatic enough that you resisted sending me that way.
All I can say to you is that my relationship with MY current therapist has been the only thing keeping me upright and moving through everything that’s happened with you.
I just want the same for dad.
Still, it feels like this was a “write you out of the will” level betrayal, in his mind.
I think that’s it for tonight. If you can think of a way for me to rectify things with him, let me know– knocking on the table, ectoplasm, whatever.
As always, I love you,